Discussion guide

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Christwise · Discussion guide · Small group

Tactics: Questions over Pronouncements

How do you have a productive conversation about faith without it turning into debate?

14 min lesson · beginner How to Discuss Faith Well Last reviewed April 26, 2026

How to use this guide

This guide is built for a 45-60 minute small-group conversation about "Tactics: Questions over Pronouncements." Open with prayer, read the framing aloud, and use the questions below to surface what people actually think before you walk through the case. Aim for honest engagement over consensus.

Facilitator tips

  • Read the lesson before the meeting; you do not need to be an expert, just a guide.
  • Resist the urge to fill silence. The best discussions follow long pauses.
  • When someone raises an objection you cannot answer, write it down and follow up next week.
  • Close with a single takeaway from each member, not a doctrinal summary.

What we're studying

Most Christians freeze not because they lack information but because they lack a posture and a few reliable moves. Greg Koukl's "Columbo tactic" — leading with thoughtful questions — lowers the temperature, invites the other person to examine their own view, and shifts the burden appropriately.

The case in brief

Three foundational questions: (1) "What do you mean by that?" — clarifies terms and ensures you are disagreeing with the actual view, not a caricature. (2) "How did you come to that conclusion?" — shifts the burden to reasons and often reveals weak foundations. (3) "Have you ever considered...?" — introduces an alternative without direct confrontation. Beneath the tactics is the posture: genuine curiosity, humility about your own limits, and patience. Apologetics conversations are almost always a long game; you are planting, watering, or harvesting — rarely doing all three in one sitting.

What if someone says...

Common objections and responses
Objection 1

"Questions can be manipulative."

Response

They can — but so can pronouncements. The test is whether the questioner genuinely wants understanding. A bad-faith question is a bad-faith move; a good-faith question opens dialogue.

Objection 2

"Some topics call for prophetic boldness, not gentleness."

Response

Both, at their appropriate times. Boldness about content is not the same as rudeness about posture. Jesus was prophetic with religious power brokers and tender with genuine seekers.

Discussion questions

  1. When was the last time a good question changed your thinking?
  2. Which of the three questions do you most need to practice?
  3. What is the conversation you have been avoiding? What question could start it?
  4. [Small group] Where in your own life does this question feel most pressing?
  5. [Small group] Who do you know that wrestles with this — and how could you talk with them about it this week?

Going deeper

Primary texts and key works behind the lesson
  • Tactics: A Game Plan for Discussing Your Christian Convictions
    Greg Koukl · 2009 (rev. 2019) · Dialogue
  • 1 Peter 3:15
    · NT Epistles

Notes

Space for what came up in your conversation

Christwise · christwise.org/lesson/dialogue-tactics · Discussion guide · Small group / Bible study

Use freely for ministry, classroom, and family contexts. Cite specific historical claims to the named scholars in the bibliography.